Remember that surf goal I set myself at the beginning of the year? The one about consistently being able to drop into and ride shoulder high waves?
A few months ago after surf club I sat in Tubestation with the girls having a post-surf mortem and eating my woes away with cake. From what I remember I’d had a shit surf. The coaches had gone on about surf goals and I felt like mine was a massive mountain to climb. I didn’t know how to break it down into smaller achievable steps, my head wasn’t in a good place at the time and I was beating myself up massively.
Then I had a revelation. It wasn’t so much about me reaching that goal. Because what had actually sparked the inspiration for it was a picture.
It was on Instagram. A girl riding a shoulder high wave on a longboard. So effortlessly and gracefully. It was the fact that she was on a longboard (which I just always assumed were only for 1-2ft days). It was also the size of the wave that captured my imagination. A wave size that scared me yet excited me at the same time.
That morning in Tubestation, I realised that it wasn’t really about the goal at all. I just wanted a picture of me riding a similar size wave.
Why? I guess for validation. For evidence. To prove to myself that I can do this and to get to where I want to with my surfing. And to look back on days when I’m struggling for motivation, or beating myself up and thinking I’m a shit surfer that I’m actually not a lost cause.
A few weeks ago, I got the picture I so badly wanted.
This picture speaks volume to me. It doesn’t convey to you guys what was going on in my head at the time and the emotions that were pouring through my veins. But everytime I look at it, I’m instantly transported back to that dreamy left at Fistral on a sunny Tuesday afternoon. A time where, in another life, I’d have been grinding away in an office instead of living my dreams…
At the start of the year, I explored ways in which I could work more actively towards my surf goals. I’d only ever had one off surf lessons and loved the idea of doing something more intensive. I didn’t have the money for an overseas surf trip, and as I mainly surf in Cornwall anyway, a week on Surf Sistas ‘white to green’ course sounded ideal.
I’m willing to bet that when anyone envisages a week’s surf trip, it’s filled with clean, perfect sized waves, sunny blue skies and warm days. That’s exactly how I imagined my week with Surf Sistas.
Yet despite the fact that Hurricane Irma had other plans (think blown out, massive waves and unsurfable beaches), we actually scored on all of the above (with maybe the exception of warmth!). But what I didn’t envisage was how much more I got out of that week – rainbows, secret (and new) surf spots, boat trips, wavehunting, friendship and some really good times!
Hello. It’s been a while…
Sadly the absence from blogging wasn’t due to me being super busy and scoring loads of waves. I lost my head for a while, jacked in the freelancing and did a lot of hiding away at home. My self esteem hit the floor and I felt pretty rubbish.
But I’m ok now. And although I didn’t feel like surfing at times, there were some occasions over the summer where I surfed the best waves of my life. My confidence has increased a lot, to the point where as long as I can physically get out back, I’ll have a go on some pretty hefty waves. I’ve made the effort to get out there, so why not push myself?
5 weeks of Polzeath Ladies Surf Club has flown by and Tuesday’s session marked the end of the first phase. Looking back, I can see just how much I’ve achieved in a relatively short space of time.
5 weeks ago I couldn’t pop up properly. Years of bad habits meant I’d repeatedly gone to my knees and I wrote myself off as a lost cause. But thanks to a supportive environment, fantastic coaching and some perseverance, I’ve nailed it!
So on Tuesday I wanted to focus on the next step and another big hurdle – paddling out back. Now I’d corrected my pop-up, it was time to venture back into the lineup and have a go at taking off on unbroken waves. George had mentioned it a couple of weeks ago and I couldn’t wait.
Except when it came down to it, I was scared shitless. Which was weird, considering I’ve paddled out back numerous times before.
Ever since I moved to Cornwall, I’ve wanted to join a weekly surf club. Primarily to progress my surfing, but also to meet some more likeminded ladies. I hadn’t found anything suitable and I’d pretty much given up on the idea…
Thankfully, Polzeath Ladies Surf Club came along at just the right time.
April’s been a busy month! I’ve had a lot of client work on which is fantastic, especially as I’m still in the early days of building up my freelance content writing and copywriting business. I’m stoked with the response so far, and to be working with some lovely clients!
Building up a business means putting in the extra hours and days but I took a week off to coincide with my mum’s visit. Lack of time beforehand meant that I still hadn’t managed a surf and wasn’t massively feeling it. So I went with the flow and turned my attention to another love of mine – walking.
I guess it was bound to happen sooner or later because everyone loses their surf stoke at some point…right? Or is it just me?
That’s right folks. I’ve well and truly lost my surf mojo. It’s taken a hike and it’s somewhere in the wilderness.
After a great start to the year, getting back into a fitness programme and going on about my winter surf goals, my stoke just woke up one day and said ‘nah..can’t be bothered with this anymore.’
2 years ago, if you’d said to me ‘you’ll live in Cornwall, work part-time and still have enough money to pay the bills and have occasional treats’ I wouldn’t have believed you. Because I honestly thought we couldn’t afford it.
It wasn’t until my other half, who is a sucker for a good spreadsheet, worked out exactly what we could afford to live on and how much we needed to earn. And it was surprisingly a hell of a lot less than we realised.
When I was landlocked, I blogged about every surf I’d ever had out of sheer excitement…which was great at the time as it allowed me to feel more connected to surfing. It also fulfilled the original purpose of the blog – to track my surf progress (kinda like an online surf diary).
Now I surf a lot more and live closer to the coast, I don’t feel the need to shout every single time I hit the waves. It’s also probably a bit dull for you guys too, and not very exciting to hear about me wiping out in minuscule detail!
I’ve been in a bit of a funk just lately. After the surprising high of January, I’ve crashed a bit this month and had a major bout of homesickness. Despite keeping up with the gym, I’ve lacked motivation to surf or blog and I completely caved in on myself and hid away at home.
Thankfully, I have some amazing friends who helped to pick me up off the floor and get me out of the house. Last week was a good opportunity to revive the Cornwall bucket list so when Jenny suggested checking out a waterfall, little did I know when I met up with her that she was talking about St Nectan’s Glen.